JENNIFER M. BLAIR’s blog

Honoring Your Life Cycles

Photo Credit: BRJ INC

By experiencing a complete cycle, it will bring the truest form of what is being created. This must occur in order for there to be fullness, understanding, sustainability and gestation of life.

How do you honor the cycles of your life? Do you give adequate leeway for the necessary stages of growth and completion to occur? Can you stick with the ups and downs, ebbs and flows… for the sake of a full and satisfying life? In today’s impatient world of hurriedness and instant gratification, there is an opportunity to slow down, be fully present and savor each stage of the journey. And, when the cycle is complete, honor what has been learned, and then start again.

Soul Sisters

Photo credit: My Sister, Michelle Blair

Soul sisters… the deeply connected females we believe know us best and love us the most. They are our closest friends who understand our essence, intuitively connect to our souls and withhold judgments by loving us no matter what. Many of us have close friends, but how many of them are truly, deeply, and madly your best girlfriend— a soul sister who has been to the depth of your despair and the heighth of your elation?

Access Your Personal Power

What makes a person powerful? Is it their money, fame, position, charisma, social status or expertise? Some of these things are important, but the most powerful person has the ability to use not only their external resources, but also access and activate their internal gifts and talents. An influential person is first and foremost true to themselves, and their internal make-up is reflected in their outside world of relationships, work, community and environment. Are you using your powers for good?

Be at Home

 Photo credit: Jennifer Blair, my family room

I must confess, this summer has been difficult as it has been my new reality that my children are really not living here any longer. I love that I have kept their childhood home for them, and it is place for them to come home to. But truth be told, it no longer feels like me. I am in a traditional space but am a more contemporary gal. I would love to live near water but love my friends and community here. So, when it comes to thinking about “ home,” I have been pondering the many aspects that make up a home, the real meaning of a home, and what it has to offer not only me but others as well.

So, where do you LIVE? Where do you feel most at home? And if you are lost, exploring or wondering, how do you find your way back to a home base for yourself? Here are some places to start looking….

Embrace Your Inner Dude

Photo credit: kyle tsui

Women, generally speaking, are kind, compassionate, patient, nurturing, generous, sweet (most of the time) and tend to provide unconditional love. Yes, we are the soft souls that provide the heart-warming gentleness to our families, friends and partners. Yet, we can be doormats, suffer in silence, become martyrs to our circumstances, and tend to put our lives on hold–all for the sake of others. Don’t get me wrong, I think women are amazing at juggling it all, and mostly being successful at it. Yet, we sometimes lack the drive, self-confidence and gumption men seem to pull off so easily.

This leads me to ask the questions, what can you learn from your male counterparts?  How can you aggressively go for what you really want and vanish the victimization? Isn’t it time to stop over-analyzing and get going? I think some of the answers can be found in lessons you can learn from guys, thereby, “embracing your inner dude.”

Capture the Extraordinary, not the Ordinary… Your Aha Moments

Photo credit: hehaden

Embracing the Aha’s of life… I love the subject of discovering revelations, witnessing turning points, capturing ultimate creativity and seeing the shift in real time as it occurs in people’s lives. After all, as a Life Coach, I am privy to amazing “aha” moments, big and small, each and every day— mine, friends, clients— and I see magic take hold as the miracles occur. So, I thought this subject would be easy to write about. But when it came down to actually putting on paper what I believe to be important, it became rather challenging.  How do you explain these amazing events, the marvel…the wonder…the awe…. the vision?

Make Your Words Stick

Photo credit: Kitti.Jacobovits

Do you say what you mean and ask for what you want? Do you use your words to build bridges and create connection with others? Or, do you find that it is a struggle to create a bond though your communication skills, sometimes coming away from an encounter feeling frustrated or disappointed?

Words hold great power in our relationships and encounters, and when used wisely, they can create strong bonds. We do this on many levels, from when we first meet someone and play the “who do we know in common game” to the soft whispers of slowly revealing ourselves to another person we desire getting closer. Do you have the glue that builds long-lasting relationships? Do you bond deeply to others? Are you building intimacy by sharing your hopes, dreams, vulnerabilities and fears?

Experience Your Full Range of Emotions

Photo credit: Paval Hadzinski

How are you feeling today?  Happy? Sad? Glad? Mad?  Can you actually name the many swirling feelings that are often going on at the same time? Women are seen as the emotional ones, the backbone of families and organizations. Yet the paradox is that when they fully express those same emotions that make them sensitive, feminine and loving, they are seen as the weaker sex or even incompetent. Women, as well as men, are taught to believe that if they cry then they are not strong, and worse, are seen as feeble, needy, dependent or even fragile. Further, people are often encouraged to suppress their feelings, to toughen up and to ignore their own needs for the sake of appearing stable and consistent.  Is that really an authentic way to live?

What Goes Around Comes Around: Take Responsibility

Photo credit: eyesogreen

I have been thinking about karma lately and how it does, or does not, play a role in our personal responsibility. I hear people use the word often, and it appears to me, there are many interpretations floating around. For instance, karma seems to have become pop culture’s word for rationalizing the good or bad things that happen to us. I sometimes hear phrases like “It must be karma,” meaning destiny or positive outcomes; “That’s my karmic debt,” implying pre-destination; or “She must have bad karma,” signifying bad luck.

Based on the many traditions and modern-day perspectives, it is no surprise that the word “karma” is overused, abused or the catch-all phrase when there is not a reasonable explanation for why something happens. Are people trying to chalk things up to “karma” as a way of not dealing with issues or to make meaning out of not having enough valid information to discern what is really happening? Is karma being used as an explanation when people are stuck in life-long patterns such as addictions, relationship issues, money problems and other serious life challenges? 

In my opinion, it does not matter what definition you choose because the point is that karma asks you to change in order to heal. It asks you to take responsibility NOW for your past and present actions, and change your behaviors going forward.

Unleash Your Inner Gypsy

Photo: John Perivolaris

I was inspired by the idea of gypsies, and I used the semblance of their lives to deepen my own path and passions. To me, gypsies have qualities that I desired more of in my life, such as their beautiful, extravagant and playful look; the free-spirited dancing and love of music; their ability to move around the world uninhibited; and their sense of community. So I used the gypsy-filled symbolism to inspire my own guidelines of balancing freedom and passion with responsibility in my world.

Don’t get me wrong; I realize gypsies have a bad reputation, especially in today’s modern world. They are known as nomads who take advantage of the people, places and things, and do not have much regard for others. However, their dreamy qualities gave me the portal to further explore how I wanted more freedom, passion, excitement, adventure and beauty in my life, and I coupled that with my personal responsibility and commitments to change my world.