Get Quiet

Photo credit: martinak15

The beginning of a new year kicks off a re-evaluation our lives: setting fresh goals; making new resolutions; reflecting on the previous year’s successes, and perhaps, failures; learning our lessons and setting our sights on what we want accomplish over the next 12 months.   

We embark on grand ideas around the perfect or healthier body, the dream job, a big savings account, a bigger house or the next great adventure. And we invest time, effort and money into pursuing our aspirations.

The problem with resolutions and setting these new goals often lies in expecting different outcomes and the exhaustion created around trying to get it all done while not letting go of something else first in order to generate sustainable solutions. We just start piling on to what we already have, making the lists longer and tasks bigger.

To make it worse, that does not even account for the enormous amount of time spent thinking about solutions. Staying in the cycle of trying to figure it all out can feel long, hard and tiring.

We need to stop making plans and creating more goals, and instead take the time to pause, get quiet, reflect and surrender. We need to consider, “why this goal?” and “how can I get there with ease and enjoyment?”

Before you launch into another year of the same old, same old – stop, go inward and make sure that what you are doing actually aligns with what you want. Getting quiet will allow you to step into the internal world of where sourcing is generated – an authentic place of knowing, without a doubt, that you are on the right track and can create more aligned actions and peaceful solutions.

In order to make changes in our lives, an inner diet is needed for the mind to cleanse the emotional baggage such as anger, resentment, worries, anxieties, busyness, old stories and the “what ifs” that might still be hanging on. Once the internal is tapped into, I believe external space needs to be freed up by letting go of people, places and things that no longer work for us. Knowing the answers from within, believing them and then moving forward will assist in getting your true needs and desires met, along with building long-term, healthy lifestyle changes for your body, mind and spirit.

As a Life Coach, clients often come to me, looking for answers. The truth is, I am simply their guide back to themselves, and I assist them in finding their own answers – a much more powerful approach, I believe, than being told what to do. After all, who knows you better than you? We work on values, faith, self-trust, confidence and the ability to have a “knowingness” about what is next, what is right and what it true. Getting quiet, hearing your own inner voice and having faith are all key elements to accomplishing all that you desire.

A great example of this practice is when I write magazine columns. After the editors and I discuss the theme, I usually have a flurry of ideas to share. I make lots of notes and brainstorm ideas with my trusted supporters. Yet, when I actually sit down to write, I often have so many concepts that they swirl around in my head. My clearest thoughts immerse after meditation (and sometimes a shower or nap). Even though it is often nerve-racking, I always have faith that the ideas will be revealed in which to share, inspire and provoke.

I believe faith is a choice, something you decide to have before it is shown to you. It is full-on trust. Trust in God or a higher power, in addition to trust in self. Faith is faith. And by choosing to honor this, the result is the ability to make powerful choices to step into clarity and creativity; and live in a peace-filled, confident existence.

Here are some steps to assist you in getting quiet, hearing your own thoughts and believing in their validity.

Eight Steps to Getting Quiet:

  1. Find a peaceful place to relax, meditate or listen to soothing music. Create a “do not disturb” zone.
  2. Set aside the time, at least 15-30 minutes, each day for your quiet time.
  3. Do a brain dump first. Take out a sheet of paper and write down all of your thoughts, feelings, to-dos and anything else in your head. Release the mind clutter.
  4. Set an intention or pose a question for your alone time.
  5. Breathe deeply and feel at ease. Notice any tension and let that go.
  6. Observe your thoughts as you allow them to move freely through you, but do not hold on to these. Detach.
  7. Listen intently for your own truth. What’s in your heart?
  8. As you conclude, practice gratitude, journal, trust and believe in your own magic.

As K.T. Jong wrote, “It is only when we silent the blaring sounds of our daily existence that we can finally hear the whispers of truth that life reveals to us, as it stands knocking on the doorsteps of our hearts.”

Get quiet, and live into the questions of your life. Launch your dreams and have faith the answers are on their way. Practice stillness as you rid yourself of your fears and prepare yourself to receive what you ask for. Listen to your heart and keep going each and every day, every step of the way.

A Coaching Exercise:

  • What is it to surrender?
  • How will hitting the pause button serve me? Those around me?
  • What is it to be centered, grounded, peaceful and clear?

Based on the steps and questions above, create your own daily ritual of quieting. Choose a place, a time, a journal, the tools and an intention. Practice this for at least 21 days and notice the changes in your life.
Meet Jennifer: Life Coach, Inspirational Speaker and Author Jennifer M. Blair is founder of Excavive™ Coaching and Consulting, based in Louisville, Kentucky. Her work focuses on empowering people to pursue their passions, increase their self-confidence, communicate powerfully and build the kind of lives they want to live. If you love these Blog posts, many have been adapted from her first book, The True You: Tools to Excavate, Explore and Evolve, published in 2011.